Relational Behaviour and Regulation Policy

Date: October 2025
Review Date: October 2026
Coordinator: SENDCo
Nominated Governor: Vicki May
Version: v10.25

Statement of Intent

At The Haven, behaviour is understood as communication, not defiance. Every action tells a story about need, safety, and connection. Our role is to listen before we label, support before we sanction, and repair before we remove.

This policy affirms that:

• All children want to belong, and behaviour improves through relationship, not fear.

• Every learner can grow when met with empathy, structure, and co-regulation.

• Inclusion and psychological safety are non-negotiable foundations for learning.

• Restorative practice replaces punishment; curiosity replaces blame.

• Exclusion is never a first response — it is a last resort following graduated, relational support.

We aim to create learning environments where regulation, reflection, and responsibility are co-taught as life skills.

Legal Framework

This policy complies with the following legislation and guidance:
Education Act 1996; Education Act 2002; Education and Inspections Act 2006; Equality Act 2010; Health Act 2006; DfE ‘Keeping Children Safe in Education 2025’; DfE ‘Behaviour in Schools 2024’; DfE ‘Suspension and Permanent Exclusion 2023’; SEND Code of Practice 2015; and associated guidance on mental health, reasonable force, and searching/screening.

Roles and Responsibilities

Governing Board

• Champion inclusion, dignity, and trauma-informed practice.

• Review this policy annually and scrutinise exclusion data.

Proprietor

• Uphold The Haven values in every decision.

• Ensure behaviour data and wellbeing indicators are reviewed holistically.

Head of Learning

• Lead relational regulation frameworks across all programmes.

• Provide training and reflective supervision for staff.

Educators and Staff

• Model respectful communication and calm presence.

• Anticipate triggers; design lessons that reduce cognitive and sensory overload.

• Use relational check-ins, not reprimands.

• Engage families in shared planning when dysregulation persists.

Learners

• Practise kindness and self-advocacy.

• Communicate when support or space is needed.

• Contribute to a culture of mutual respect through The Haven Code of Respect.

Parents and Guardians

• Maintain calm home routines that support regulation.

• Communicate contextual changes or emerging needs promptly.

• Reinforce The Haven values of curiosity, compassion, and cooperation.

Definitions

• Relational Rupture: a breakdown in connection that causes distress or disruption.

• Repair: the process of restoring trust and safety through dialogue and reflection.

• Low-level behaviours: signs of dysregulation such as distraction, withdrawal, or lateness.

• Serious behaviours: actions causing harm or discrimination, to be managed within safeguarding and restorative frameworks.

All behaviour is reviewed through a neurodevelopmental and sensory lens before any response is decided.

Staff Induction, Development and Support

All staff receive onboarding in The Haven’s trauma-informed, neuro-affirmative, and attachment-aware approaches.
Continuous CPD includes:

• Co-regulation and relational discipline

• Executive-function scaffolding

• Autism and ADHD profiles

• Restorative conferencing and narrative repair

• Compassion fatigue awareness and staff wellbeing

Reflective supervision is offered termly or as needed.

Supporting Social, Emotional and Mental Health (SEMH)

The Haven integrates emotional literacy into every aspect of the curriculum:

• Daily wellbeing or sensory check-ins

• Access to calm rooms and digital regulation spaces

• Emotion coaching embedded in feedback

• Flexible scheduling or sensory accommodations

Managing Behaviour Through Relationship

Our approach is proactive, preventative, and personalised.
We prioritise:

• Connection before correction – noticing distress early.

• Co-regulation – lending calm when learners cannot find their own.

• Restoration – repairing trust and re-establishing safety.

• Reflection – helping learners understand impact and choose next steps.

No response will shame, isolate, or humiliate a learner.

Key Terms and Core Practices

Co-Designed Agreements

Co-designed agreements are relational commitments developed collaboratively between the learner, their tutor, and - where appropriate - the parent/carer or commissioner.
They describe what helps the learner feel safe, calm and ready to learn, and outline shared expectations for communication, participation, and support. These agreements are reviewed regularly and adapted when needs or circumstances change.

Restorative Reflection

Restorative reflection is the process used at The Haven when an incident disrupts learning or relationships. The purpose is to repair, not punish.
During restorative reflection, the learner is guided to explore:

• What happened

• What they were feeling or needing

• The impact on others

• What can be done differently next time

A pastoral or wellbeing staff member may facilitate this process. Notes are recorded in line with safeguarding procedures.

Temporary Removal from a Session

If a learner’s behaviour compromises safety or learning and other co-regulation strategies are unsuccessful, the tutor may temporarily remove the learner from the live session.
This action is used as a safety measure - not a sanction - and is always followed by a restorative reflection before the next session resumes. The DSL and parent/carer are notified when a removal occurs.

Digital Etiquette

The Haven’s digital classrooms (Pencil Spaces, Canvas) are learning environments governed by the same principles of respect and inclusion as any physical classroom.

Expectations:

• Chat use: Keep chat relevant to learning; avoid spamming or off-topic comments.

• Camera and microphone: Learners choose whether to appear on camera but must signal engagement respectfully.

• Emoji use: Emojis are welcome for communication but never for sarcasm, teasing, or coded language.

• Tone: Written messages should be kind, inclusive, and mindful.

• Platform-specific norms: Only official The Haven channels are used; no private staff-learner messaging.

Breaches of these expectations follow the tiered response below.

Tiered Response System for Online Behaviour

Tier	Response	Typical Examples	Follow-up
1 – Gentle Reminder	Tutor gives a verbal or chat reminder.	Off-topic chat, minor distraction.	Noted informally.
2 – 1:1 Discussion	Tutor meets learner individually to review co-designed agreement.	Repeated chat misuse, unkind tone.	DSL notified if pattern emerges.
3 – Temporary Removal	Learner removed for remainder of session; restorative reflection arranged.	Persistent disruption, inappropriate comments.	DSL log; parent/carer informed.
4 – Restorative Meeting	Facilitated by DSL/pastoral lead with learner, parent/carer, and commissioner (if applicable).	Ongoing moderate incidents or harm to others.	Actions recorded and shared.
5 – Commissioner Review	DSL convenes multi-agency meeting to decide next steps.	Repeated or serious breaches, sharing harmful content.	Formal report completed.

All stages prioritise understanding and repair over punishment.

Preventing Harmful Content Online

The Haven maintains safe digital spaces through:

• Platform moderation – only approved, age-appropriate platforms used.

• Session recording and monitoring – recordings may be reviewed for safeguarding.

• Filters and supervision – inappropriate content blocked and reported.

• Staff training – all tutors trained in online safety and Prevent Duty.

• Immediate reporting – any harmful, sexualised, extremist or discriminatory content triggers DSL escalation and potential LADO contact.

Reporting, Recording and Commissioner Liaison

• Low-level concerns (e.g. minor disruptions) are logged internally and monitored for patterns.

• Serious or repeated behaviour is reported to the DSL within 24 hours.

• The DSL will inform the commissioner and convene a review meeting when behaviour is persistent or escalates.

• All outcomes are documented and shared with parent/carers and commissioners within five working days.

Behaviour Curriculum

We explicitly teach:

• Self-awareness and self-advocacy

• Understanding of sensory and emotional states

• Communication and boundary-setting skills

• Repair and reconciliation practices

• Collective responsibility and care for community

De-escalation and Containment

Temporary removal from a shared space occurs only when:

• Immediate safety is at risk;

• Regulation is impossible in the moment; or

• Learning cannot continue for others.

A supervised calm space or 1:1 check-in is used supportively, never punitively.
Staff use non-confrontational language and maintain connection throughout.

Sexual Harassment, Abuse and Discrimination

Zero tolerance for all forms of harassment or discriminatory conduct.
All concerns are treated as safeguarding matters and managed in line with our Child Protection and Safeguarding Policy v01.26.
Support is trauma-informed, survivor-centred, and proportionate.

Effective Lesson Design and Environment

Lessons at The Haven are structured to reduce anxiety and executive-function load:

• Predictable routines and visual schedules

• Clear transitions and countdowns

• Flexible pacing and movement breaks

• Assistive technology and multimodal expression

• Scaffolded language and expectations

• Reflection time at the end of sessions

The Haven Learner Agreement (Code of Respect)

• Be kind, always.

• Take a breath before reacting.

• Ask for a break when you need one.

• Try, pause, and try again.

• Respect others’ space, time, and privacy.

• Share ideas and listen with curiosity.

• Celebrate your growth.

• Solve problems together.

Recognition and Affirmation

• Celebrate effort, courage, and growth, not mere compliance.

• Offer descriptive, strength-based feedback.

• Encourage peer-to-peer recognition and gratitude practices.

• Link privileges or rewards to responsibility and contribution, not control.

Data Collection and Evaluation

• Behaviour and regulation data logged and analysed termly.

• Patterns explored through reflective dialogue, not punishment matrices.

• Feedback from learners and families informs ongoing development.

• Data reviewed by the SENDCo and DSL to identify systemic triggers or inequities.

Monitoring and Review

This policy is reviewed annually by the Proprietor and Governing Board.
Learner, staff, and family feedback directly inform updates.
Findings from reviews feed into staff training, curriculum design, and wellbeing planning.

Addendum for Behaviour Management Policy

Addendum: Restrictive Physical Interventions, Restraints, and Exclusions

**Purpose
**This addendum should be read alongside The Haven’s Behaviour and Regulation Policy ( October 2025). It demonstrates alignment with statutory guidance and expectations regarding the use of restrictive interventions and exclusions.

1. Restrictive Physical Interventions (RPI)

• The Haven operates as an online provider. The Haven does not use RPI.

2. Sanctions

• The Haven emphasises restorative and relational responses.

• Sanctions may include reflective conversations, restorative meetings, or structured support agreements.

• Sanctions are never humiliating, discriminatory, or applied without consideration of SEND or trauma history.

3. Exclusions

• Permanent exclusion is not part of The Haven’s provision.

• Temporary withdrawal from live sessions may occur if behaviour presents risk or prevents learning.

• All exclusions (including temporary online exclusions) are logged, reviewed by the DSL, and communicated to commissioning schools/authorities where relevant.

4. Monitoring

• Termly DSL-led review of behaviour logs and sanctions.

• Annual reporting to governors to ensure proportionality, equity, and alignment with LA safeguarding frameworks.

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